Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Morning Run And Gratefulness


There is nothing like a morning run.

The views.

The brisk summer air.

The "good mornings" to the folks you pass on the sidewalk.

The feeling of your feet hitting the ground one after the other after the other.

The feeling of your muscles getting tighter and more toned with each and every step.

The satisfaction of knowing you just ran your personal best mile splits of the summer.

The soreness in your muscles afterwards, solidifying you gave it your all.

But my favorite part of a morning run?

Thinking.

Morning runs are my time to think, uninterrupted.

Not about work.

Not about what I have to do today, or what I should have accomplished yesterday.

But to just be....be grateful.

This morning I could feel myself running the fastest I've ran this summer.

I didn't need my iPhone to tell me, I could just feel it.

It got me thinking back to childhood, when the thought of going on a run made me cringe.

I fast forwarded to high school when I decided to go out for cross country, which got me thinking about the Jacobs' family. They worked with me every day in the summer to get me ready for cross country season year after year. They ultimately taught me to love running and were able to bring out the inner athlete inside of me.

I thought about the fact that I would not be here, in this moment, running this 5 mile run if it wasn't for Steve. And Marilyn. And Whitney. And Cortney. And Stephanie. And Justin. And how I am so grateful for them that I am here, running the fastest I've been able to run this summer, all because they invested their time in me.

I am so grateful for them!

I thought about writing them a thank you, but then I thought, how do I write my gratitude in a 4x5 inch thank you card? Where would I even begin? 

I thought about knee surgery.

Three weeks from today I will have my knee cut into. My bones will be broken and moved. Screws will be placed around my knee. And I won't be able to do this activity I've grown to love. I will have to say 'see you soon' to running and working out as I've known it the last however many years.

While that thought seems awful, I have to think of it as bittersweet. Because, in the end, I'm finally going to have a knee that loves these grueling workouts I put it through, and I won't be on a steady diet of ice and aleve.

I thought about recovery. How I'm as fit as I probably have ever been right now, and I will completely rock this recovery because of that! That in six months from now, I will be back out here, doing this thing I love so much again. I may not be as fast as I want to be or as strong as I want to be, but I will not stop until I get there.

Because running and working out makes me happy.

So I will choose to be grateful for an uncle who will make my knee new again which will allow me to continue to run and workout for years to come so the pure joy I feel in this moment doesn't have to end.

I thought about nutrition. How it has been such a struggle for me over my 26 years of life.

I thought about how this run I'm on feels so good because I'm being kind to my body with how I'm fueling it now. I wish I could go back and shake myself for thinking I could eat whatever I wanted because I worked out hard, everyday.

How I wish I could be an ambassador to anyone struggling with their weight letting them know, "You CANNOT out work a poor diet!" because I thought that way for so long.

I thought about Kim. She has taken hours out of her busy life to teach me what to eat, how much, when to eat it and why so that I could be successful. What a gift! I am forever grateful for you, Kim!

I thought these struggles and successes I've gone through on my weight loss journey.

They have molded me into the woman I am today; a woman I am proud to be.

They have taught me hard work and dedication DO get you somewhere, if you just get up and show up every morning, trying to be better.

They have taught me that I can do anything I set my mind to.

But most importantly, they have made me grateful.

Grateful for the journey.

Grateful for people.

Grateful for surgeries.

And most of all, grateful for all the blessings in my life. Big or small.

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